i often wonder why i’m so tired all the time?

am i not eating very well? eating far too well most of the time!

not exercising enough? could do more maybe but more than most

going out all hours of the night? oh yeah right old raver me

drinking too much? tea perhaps booze barely interested, i’m a light weight

i have a small child, does he keep me up at night? not at all he has been a love in the sleeping department

so what is it? why am i completely knackered? all. the. time.

then i looked back on my day, and here i think is why

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so there’s a family

in that family there’s just one child and just one parent works, that parent earns 64k

0% child benefit

next door there’s another family

they too just have one child but both parents work and they both earn 32k which *grabs calculator* makes the total household income 64k

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today out of my pocket i pulled the monthly invoice from the nursery. i tend to ignore this each month and just let it come out of the account without having to look at it too much, as it’s just too painful. normally it’s popped into ronnies bag and i put it up stairs in the study and it gets filed. however it wasn’t in his bag it had been handed to me personally and for some strange reason, today i decided to open the envelope and read it. how painful was it? it was one thousand, three hundred and eighty-one pounds and fifty-three pence worth of pain.

ouch

so today this happened

idiot woman : oh so you work full-time?

hpmcq : yes i work full-time

idiot woman : *scowling face like she just trod in dog shit* why do you do that if you have a child?

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this second week of the new year is the week out of the whole year that i dread the most. i don’t think i’m alone, i’m pretty sure anyone that does my job, in roughly the same product area who also has a family and small children must all feel the same. every time i travel on business i can’t wait to get back. i’m ok once i’m here/there/wherever and I’m in the detail of what i do and cracking on with it, it’s the lack of contact with my boys.

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